He Died so I can Live
The moment we take out first breath, is the beginning of our slow death, is the moment we are dying.
We live like we are to live forever. We workout and eat like we're growing stronger and invincible. The truth is, we're only going to end up dying healthier that way, if that was the final case. We don't know.
The libraries and book stores has endless amounts of books on "how to be here and now", "live in the present", "enjoy today". We have ancient scripture on "living today, tomorrow has it's own worries", "love each other, focus on the now, don't let the world take you astray".
The moment you put your kids to sleep is the moment your heart and mind is connecting overdrive. You reflect on your mistakes of the day, the words you shouldn't have said, the frown and mean look you gave and caused, the yelling, the bickering, the pointless arguing that, then, seemed to be so important. Your heart is heavy now, everything around you is so precious, is a blessing, you see your inadequacy, your brokenness... you regret. You feel guilty. You think of tomorrow as a blank canvas, a new chance, you're wiser now, you will make a change.
"I will enjoy and answer their questions, I will take my time and be present. I won't rush or rush them, tomorrow we live enjoy each other. I'm so excited, I cannot wait to get to know them, talk to them, see and hear them, instead of herding them from A to B to C,.. Tomorrow!"
Tomorrow's here and before you even know it, you're awake herding your family from A to B and to C... and finally rushing them off to bed, because it's "past" their bed time. "Finally, they are a sleep!" And you reflect on your shortcomings and you've made the "yesterday's" mistakes again...
When I lie down to sleep, I cannot but pray for a friend of mine who is battling cancer. I do not know if she is overcoming the beast or if she just has it cornered for now. I wonder how she sees her life at this very moment. How does she see her husband, he child.. her sweet child? What are her hopes for her child, what is her fiercest prayer upon her loved one? How does she see what the world has to offer now? Are there people in her life that she wants to be with each and every day, is she growing stronger spiritually, is she looking forward to meeting her Creator or is she asking for more time?
I often wonder why we seem to be shocked and surprised with news like so? We are dying too... We may not battle cancer at this very moment, or been hit by a car either, but we are making our way out of this world as I type and as you read this. Everyone is going... dying. Our ticket out of here just varies.
Why do we let the world spin us around until we are dizzy with, I wouldn't even call it business, but, thinking we are invincible,- immortal? What would happen, if you would accept the fact that you don't know whether you have days or weeks or even just years until you are to pass, would that change the rest of your life?
Our days are numbered, if only we could grasp that fact and live like this what we so preciously have, is all that matters.
I'm only truly alive in Him, and this is not the end.