Pelvic Floor Update

Here is another cross post, a blog post written by me on my other pregnancy blog. I felt this is important to share with other mothers, especially if you've had multiple births, so please read!

Physio Update

A few weeks ago I wrote this 

..."I've been to see a physio, who specializes in women's pelvic floor (pre- and postnatal). I have homework I need to do daily to strengthen/maintain my pelvic floor during the rapid growth of the baby, help in birth and fast healing post birth. But mostly, I am doing them so I stop peeing myself every time a sneeze or have a coughing fit! I know, too much info, but I know -you know what I mean!

Daily Kegels workout:

30 x 5+sec squeezes with 10sec break in between. This takes about 8 minutes to do. 

30 x quick squeezes with 10sec break in between.

I've been trying to remember to do this everyday for two weeks, and so far I have already seen felt an improvement. I have got two more weeks to do these exercises until my next appointment.."...

Today I saw my physio for a quick follow up appointment, to see how things have progressed with my 'dilemma'.

Two weeks ago, I couldn't cough, sneeze or laugh (and at times with no reason) without "leakage". I was wearing a thin liner and had to change it 2-3 x a day. I know I was 22 weeks pregnant, but this was alarming and I needed to seek professional help. 

There was no way that I, age 31 (or ever) had to be in such a weak state, where there was no connection with my mind and body, in such a way. All I can say that I am happy that I went and paid that money to see the specialist physio.

Here is where I was

• leakage, pad change 2-3 x a day
• pregnancy week 22
• waking up at night to visit the wc
• couldn't laugh, sneeze, or cough without leakage
• couldn't hold a kegel for more than 4 seconds

2 weeks later with these exercises

Here I am today

• No leakage, haven't worn a pad for 1 1/2 weeks
• pregnancy week 24
• no night time bathroom visits
• laughing, sneezing and coughing without leakage
• I can hold a kegel for more than 10 seconds

I cannot believe how fast this change took place and that it's not rocket science, as my physio puts it! Simple, simple exercises that don't make you sweat, don't take up too much time, can be done anytime and anywhere -has done so much in such little time frame.

My exercises have moved on to new ones, which I will be doing throughout my pregnancy and also after birth. I have a follow up appointment 2 months after birth to see what needs doing regarding my pelvis alignment etc.

Ladies, I urge you! Get sorted before it's super hard or too late!

Mini testimonials welcome, leave a comment!

Post Kids - "Getting Your Life Back"

I hear this often, "When will you get your life back?" "Will you have more kids?" Sometimes from people around me, but sometimes I hear it in my head. The question to me from others and the question to myself might look the same, but they are quite different. How?

After having our second child, I still lived like we had one. I was swamped, booked to the max in my calendar and chasing after time wasting stuff. I didn't realize that life should change a little bit to accommodate a new family member. Well, it should. However, I was determined to live like before,  carrying tons of guilt and I was at the very edge of having a melt down. I felt, then, that I couldn't give the people around me my time, and when I did give it, (out of guilt) it took away from my husband and my children and precious resting time. I think that a lot was expected from me, and that I brought it on myself by being a people pleaser.

Reading through my old prayer journal, my number one prayer a few years ago, was that I would get more time with my family and that I would learn how to be present. Well, after our big move away from a busy social life and 3 jobs, I finally got the opportunity to focus on what God taught me, and still is teaching me. 

At first, I wondered when I would make new friends and get "my life back" like it was, or similar to what it was before our move. Becoming pregnant with our third did not slow me down as much as we thought it would. I might've been less active, being sick and all, but the guilt that I carried (which activities we all should be involved in etc.) and my busy brain, still kept pushing ahead full speed.

I needed to, not only part from my life previously known, but to part from, well, nearly everything I made a habit out of. It was like LIFE spring cleaning. Out with the old, and little by little, after lots of  thought and prayer, in with the new. Bringing in what was really important and good. 

If this is the season for me to not make friends and not be active with the women's ministry, but completely serve my family, so be it. I have the perfect opportunity to make my surroundings my LIFE and my JOB, which I love. What am I here for? What could be a holier calling than to raise my children and mould mankind? It won't go to waste.

What from my life, then, do I want back that is so important? 

A few weeks ago, I realized that I'm just running myself into the ground by trying to do things with three kids, that I did with two kids. It's not going to happen and that is OK. If you struggle with guilt and high expectations of yourself, get rid of them and let go. I encourage you to take this step. It is very liberating and you will also gain so much more out of life by doing so.

I have more time now with three, than I did with two, and it is nice for my husband to not live life at 300 mph. He also feel comforted in the fact that the kids get their mother and the attention that they require and deserve, which is opposite to pulling them from one appointment to the next as baggage.

I would try to pack our days with everything possible, so I wouldn't miss life. What I was actually doing, was in fact, missing life. I went from overbooking to underbooking, from one extreme to another, because I was afraid of choosing the wrong thing (what ever that could be?), and ended up choosing nothing. This too, wasn't good. Where is the balance? What is worth doing and where do the standards come from?

I think we take more time to think about what to do nowadays, rather than just doing whatever and whenever we like. We have learnt to value our time, and to understand how positive the idea of "just being" is. Not necessarily doing anything or going anywhere, but just being together at home enjoying family time. Hearing, seeing and acknowledging each other, fully.