The Struggle Is Real -2016

I know that women in developing countries have serious struggles of their own, but can you imagine what our struggles might look like in their eyes?

• Having to endlessly pick up after our kids around the house, I can't take it!
• You can't find your shoes, where are your socks??!
• I'm having to trip over stuff to get to where I am going!
• The sink is overflowing of dishes, again.
• This (food) is out of date, ugh!  my life is so hard!
• The laundry just keeps on piling, I can't keep up with it..:(
• Who left all of the books strewn all over the floor, -pick them up!!?
• It's been nonstop all day for me, I just need to take a bath.

I could go on and on with our "struggles" but the more I think about it, the more ashamed I am. Oh the guilt! So, I'm turning my shame into motivation to seriously purge my home.

I feel like I'm always purging my home. Is it just me or does anyone else seem to be donating boxes or bags of stuff after a huge purging episode?? I swear, the enemy knows my weaknesses. After 8 bags of purging, feeling that much lighter and free, someone brings me boxes of hand me downs of stuff. The hoarder within me, says "yeah, sure I'll have a look!" and guess what, EVERYTHING has potential. I should learn. If I can't see it, I won't miss it and even if I see it, I probably will not miss it. A fact.

How then do I de-itemize my home for good and is "for good" even a realistic expectation? Looking up at those struggles listed, could I swap those struggles for things that matter eternally? Let me break them down for us.

1. Having to endlessly pick up after our kids around the house, I can't take it! Our homes in westernized countries are so full of stufffffff. We think we need it, we hoard it, we save it, stack it, storage it and we keep accumulating more stuff. I cannot even wrap my head around the sum of $$ we would save, if we were not so easily swept away with things. The things we buy, we end up purging anyway sooner or later. The things we own, end up binding us, they end up owning us in one way or another. We lose precious time for instance, we become around the clock cleaners, maintainers, and hunters (hunts for the missing {insert here}!).. It robs us from time for ourselves, as mothers. Our kids go to bed and you have so much to prep for in order to survive the next day, and then you're done for the day. Would you not want to curl up and read your favourite book? Read those blog posts that you bookmarked for a quiet moment? Could this be your quiet moment, where you work on a project you've been thinking about for months? Does motherhood and you time have to be a balancing act? Can it not just be the journey you are on and there is no seperation of the two? How would it be, if instead of STRIVING, we could be THRIVING in the coming days? Would the shouts and arguments over toys scattered around the home be swapped into talks and cuddles and outdoor walks? What steps must we take, in today's society and the areas we live in to make this a reality? 
2. You can't find your shoes, where are your socks!? How many pairs of shoes does one child, never mind woman have? YES, there can be too many shoes. This is a nuisance in my home. My kids never seem to find their shoes, always one shoe missing. I see them trying to leave the house with sandals in the middle of winter, and it drives me bonkers! "Where are your shoes?!" How many pairs do kids need, as they are growing up fast anyway, and don't get a chance to enjoy them long enough? A few "shoe cultures" I admire are the Finnish and Koreans. Finns never walk inside the home with their shoes on and leave them beside the front door. Koreans always seem to take their shoes off in the most respectful way possible. Say what? Yes, have you ever seen anyone place their shoes away in such a symmetrical manner, I have! Koreans :) If I had the shoes I need, (which I actually have fewer than I "need"), my kids would live by example. If they had just the right amount of shoes for designated weather, they would be lost or mistreated, especially when you have multiple kids! I can't help but think of Little House On The Prairie, when the girls would cherish everything they had as it was gold. Their corn husk dolls, special laced up shoes.. polished, ready for school. Could we adapt that mentality? How can we, when we live in this society. how can we fight the strong winds of today's capitalism and pass that onto our children? I'm talking about shoes, but this goes for every piece of clothing.
3. I'm having to trip over stuff to get to where I am going! What would your life look like if you were not swayed by Walmart or Pinterest? Would you walk into a temple instead of a westernized, asthma risk house? Would our homes be a place of rest and worship? Would you be aware of your surroundings, instead of being drowned in visual noise? Picture this for a moment...What would your home look like? I have purged so much, yet I still have too much stuff I have a hard time parting with. I guess I don't have the answer for that, yet. Yet.
4. The sink is overflowing of dishes, again. Well, how many dishes do we need? Most of us have a dishwasher, how crazy is that. We tend to talk about how back in the day, they had house servants, and how we have to do everything by ourselves. Well, we have house servants too! We got a dishwasher, laundry machines, most of us have a coffee maker, fridge, the endless kitchen appliances - list yours! We even have a vacuum cleaner! How cool is that! A machine that sucks up dust and bits and good Lord, is that not a praise worthy privilege? Not to forget, the toilet! We have running water, electricity.. it's just mind blowing when I think of the stuff we have, yet we moan about our "load". Can you picture that the developing world mothers face, when she sees your list of "servants"? Embarrassing! Turning my shame into motivation-turning my shame into inspiration! What can we do, to own less dishes. Every dish has a story, a potential- how can we minimize our cupboards? Keep on purging, I know I'll get there! And, so will you!
5. This (food) is out of date, ugh!  my life is so hard! I read this thing on the "time-wasting-book" page once, "When I buy a lettuce, I usually bin it right away. Saves me doing it in a weeks time".. I chuckled, but it's so true! Not only do we have this gadget in the kitchen that keeps our food fresh, we forget about our food. We take the food for granted in some way or form. Take the time to look at this video below. I'm on a mission. I would like to go back to basics with 'food'. Simplify the ingredients and the source of food, so that it gets the respect it deserves. Genesis 1:29 and 2:9 and much much more... Read the THM Plan book!! HERE is my aff'link, check it out! (For those who do not know, this is the reason for my cleared up complexion! read about it HERE) 
6. The laundry just keeps on piling, I can't keep up with it..:( So my girlfriend and I were daydreaming about what our laundry piles would look like if all of our kids and us, had 2-4 sets of clothes. The loads would be smaller, and it would be a small load to carry (ha ha pun intended!). The kids wouldn't get bored, they're growing kids! The turn over would still happen, correct? And, we would always have something to wear! No longer would we have mismatch items, speaking gibberish to us. It would all make sense.
7. Who left all of the books strewn all over the floor, -pick them up!!? Sometimes I catch my kids using the books in their plays, as chairs or whatever. They're on the floor instead of where they belong. I hate the fact that the baby gets a book and manages to rip out a page or two. A lot of book mending going on in my home, it sorrows me. I love books. Books used to be irreplaceable. Now we get most of our information online. I would like to keep this art very much alive in my home. The smell of pages when you open the book, I love it! How can we, in today's tech savvy world, pass on these things to our kids? Put them behind locked doors, watch over them as they read -not in my house hold. Is this just a lazy-mother syndrome, or do you see where I am going with this? I cannot stand over them and watch them put away each book. Is there another way to pass on the value of books on to my kids?
8. It's been nonstop all day for me, I just need to take a bath.  What if we didn't have all the stuffff to do everyday that having a moment to yourself that gets interrupted, wasn't such a big deal after all? Get what I am saying?

Thoughts??? Please do share!

Collages -Homeschool Project

("God's People" by K)

This week the kids worked on collages of their own. We used the stack of National Geographic mags I've stored for too long. Now, I know how we will be using them. I fondly remember my own art lessons, especially making collages and the ideas are limitless!

Here are some ideas on Collages:

• Seasons, weather
• Celestial
• Nature
• Animals, polar, ocean, grassland, jungle etc
• Healthy and unhealthy foods
• Physical activity, sports
• Feelings, moods, faces
• Space, planets
• Technology
• Bible
• Culture
• Art
• Words
• Countries
• Colour Map

 ("God's Creation" by J)

I already have a few collage themes planned out for this school year. Some of them will cover more than the subject 'art'.

Any more ideas on a theme? Let me know!

More on Homeschooling HERE!

More on Fun With Kids HERE

Managing Your Home Part 3

A little while ago I wrote this:

..."Organizing your home is quite the task. It takes a super mom to herd her little monkeys and get everyone and her home in order at all times. This, however is unrealistic and will only bring frustration and disappointment to those mothers who thrive on this.

But there is hope for us all, even for me as I write this in the midst of a chaotic moment in my home. I write down lists for my kids of chores that need to be completed before we begin our day. "Build the home, before we play in it" is somewhat what we are after. Well, I have my eldest back chatting and rebelling, my daughter in cloud 9 dreaming of butterflies and singing, and my littlest one, causing havoc as she trots along. Not the haven, I was hoping for.

I put KLOVE on for motivational music, to help us focus and plug in, only to find out it's just adding to the chaos. I really am starting to feel hopeless now, how does anyone teach their children to contribute to the family life"...

And now, finally! 

We're done scheduling for now! It took some time, figuring it all out because no day in the week is the same for us. But we're done for now. We're on trial mode right now, just to see how well the master schedule will work out and I already have a feeling, that I'll be doing a few minor changes here and there, but all in all, I'll say it again - We're I'm DONE!

Here's an example of a day during our week. Oh yes, I went to dollar store and purchased 7 frames and some magnetic strip to minimize our fridge clutter. It looks nicer...

I've noticed better behavior in the kids and especially in me, holy moly, less of that tensed up wicked witchiness! The kids have been back chatting less, and it seems that they cannot argue with a schedule on the wall, but they can argue with me. If it's written, it goes and I've noticed an attitude change in them, I really have.

We get bible time each morning, and it can last from 15 to 30 minutes. I'm using this book with them, and we're enjoying it. The kids sit still, even our youngest who is 2 and these lessons lead to some deep conversations and it has really helped us bond. It gives a good start to the mornings and focuses our attention to the one who gives us time. Jesus. 

I must admit, I'm more flexible than maybe some other mothers are, using this method, and it's ok. Sometimes we decide to do other stuff instead of what's on the list, however, I've still noticed that everything gets done and we have plenty of rest too. It takes practice and consistency to create a new habit, a new schedule. We'll get there, I know it!

Another thing I have noticed is that the kids argue and bicker less. One, they don't get too bored and end up in each others faces, and two, I have the time to teach and take the time to guide them when I see a problem arising. I also believe that our bible time in the mornings places our hearts in a way that our minds are tuned with doing what is right. This is my opinion.

One thing I like about colour coding the schedule is, that my middle child doesn't yet know how to read, but by knowing the theme of the colours, she memorizes them quickly.

More on Organizing your home and scheduling HERE!

More on Fun With Kids HERE

More on Managing Your Home HERE

What are your tricks for keeping on top of things, or semi? :)

Managing Your Home Part 1

Since having more than one kid, fourth one on the way, I feel like I need to invest in training my children to be proactive and contribute a bit more to this household.

Lately I have been quite overwhelmed with keeping this home in a semi clean state, while homeschooling and living the basic daily life, you know, needed grocery shopping, meal making, diaper changing, nose wiping, hobby driving- life. Something needed to be done.

I ordered the Managers of Their Homes book, to get me organized once and for all. I have not gone through the whole book yet, but needless to say, I have picked up some valuable jewels along the way. I cannot, cannot, cannot, do everything in this home without sacrificing the relationships that matter the most to me, So, I have taken the very first steps to being more wise about the 24h we have been given each day.

There is freedom in structure, in scheduling, in rhythm. Yes there is. I've only tested a fraction of our new possible "master schedule" for the last few days, and we have spent more time reading, playing games, spending time together in general, while our home has kept afloat. *BIG SMILE* The house has not fallen apart! Which, to be honest, it usually does -one or the other suffers.

Sooooo, I'm so excited!!!! What are the few new (old but new) changes we have made?

Training the kids to be proactive.

Bathroom Training - Keeping the bathroom clean! No toys, no books and no toilet paper strewn all over the floor. No smudged toothpaste in the sink and no semi rinsed tooth brushes left out. 

First we tell them. Then we demonstrate. Then we supervise.....Then we remind them. 

I left a pack of wipes under the sink for the kids to give the sink a daily wipe if they see smudges. The bag of toilet paper is out of sight, so if the roll on the wall has run out (which they will learn how to change themselves) they need to ask for help. Otherwise, seriously, there will be several rolls and pieces strewn all over the floor. 

I wrote a temporary reminder on the wall saying,

"Bathroom Rules-

Keep it mess free! -No toys, no books, no papers...

Wash your hands with WARM water and soap. (My kids tend to be lazy with the tap and use cold only)

Turn off the lights, and close the door.

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The Dinner Table Training - 

1. No play No messing around, no toys on the table etc
2. Clean up after yourself Bring your dishes to the sink or dishwasher, wipe up after yourself and if needed sweep under the table.
3. Ruoka Rauha (direct translation food peace = dinner peace) 

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I purchased some pull out drawers for the cupboard next to our dishwasher, so that our kids could easily empty the dishwasher in the mornings. Usually it's been quite the hassle for them, since our plates and cups were directly on top of the washer and they had to get on and off the kitchen chair to manage the task. So for a while, it has been Simon and I doing the dishes. Well, after purchasing and after Simon installing the mesh drawers, the kids have easily been able to do this morning chore without frustration. This "small" chore has given me the chance to focus on getting breakfast done and changing baby Lucy's morning nappy, on top of other bits and bobs, that would usually leave me rushing around.

We have a long way to go yet, with finishing up a chore list for each family member, a daily schedule, a meal planner and making sure everyone gets enough one on one time with each other. We want to make sure, everyone -including the parents, get enough sleep each night, we want to plan and prep for healthy meals, we want to live a more stress free-rush free life, we want to teach the kids responsibility, we want to build relationships between family members and so on.

There is a pioneer family of 11, who inspired us to get this book. Have a look at her website! www.largefamiliesonpurpose.com

What are your ways of keeping your family afloat?